I just don’t want to do anything
There are piles of clothes to wash. A dishwasher to empty.
I have blog posts to write for this month.
I haven’t even begun writing my next novel, and the last one was published months ago.
There are emails to respond to and certainly something in the house needs cleaning.
And over there is that pile of papers that have sat on the edge of my desk waiting to be filed for – I am afraid to say – months.
It isn’t like I don’t have plenty of things to keep me busy. But do I want to do any of these things?
Nope. Not a one.
Ugh. It is one of those days where I would rather curl up and read a book or waste my time surfing the Internet or binge watch a TV shows series that I have already seen. (Hmm…perhaps The Magicians.) That is assuming I can find a free TV to watch it on. (See last week’s post.)
This feeling of apathy, of disinterest, of lack of motivation is not new. Thankfully, it doesn’t hit often but oh when it does…. I feel horrible. I know there is so much to be done. But oh how I don’t want to do it.
This feeling often hits me after I have been doing something outside the house in the morning, which is my favorite time to run errands as the stores are less crowded. But going places in the morning – whether it is errands or an activity with kids – seems to kill my motivation for the rest of the day, especially when it comes to writing. In fact, I think I do my best writing in the mornings.
And now with it being summer, the kids sleep in, and we don’t get to any activities until later. Then when we return home, this feeling of apathy to do any of the many things I have to do sets in.
But it isn’t always an afternoon occurrence. Sometimes out of the blue when I have my day fully planned, it hits. And it is a struggle to get anything done because I would rather be doing nothing.
Some might say that a day or an afternoon off could do some good. And sometimes I do give in and do nothing, but I know myself. I will feel more stress about all those undone items on my to-do list. So I usually force myself to do something…anything rather than doing nothing.